Rewriting WA2

By Qi Dan
After I identified the problems of my first draft, I decided to rewrite the introductory paragraph and modify the following paragraphs. Since my first draft exceeds the word limit of WA2, I also tried to make my language in the second draft more concise and cut off some unnecessary expressions.
The rewritten introduction begins with definition of Generation IV reactors and gas-cooled fast reactor, one specific type of Generation IV reactors. After the definition, I introduce the key issue, which is “whether R&D funding for gas-cooled fast reactors should be supported”, and talk about opinions from both sides. In the last, sentence of the first paragraph, I write my new thesis statement which contains the argumentative issue, my own stance, and the development of this essay.
After I have done some research, I found that the three main advantages of gas-cooled fast reactors are better sustainability, safety and a wider-range of industrial applications. Regarding the this three advantages, I have searched issues such as the destructive effects radioactive wastes produced by gas-cooled fast reactor, some nuclear accident and the global energy supply scenario in order to identify some opposing views. After reading through many online-document and scientific journals, I summarize the ideas that can be used in my essay. Then, I replace the first sentence of the each body paragraph using a summary of one specific opposing view. After the opposing view, I rebut using some scientific evidence such as some statistical data and experiment results. At the end of each body paragraph, there is a short summary sentence.
Last, I summarize the three main points of my essay and restate my thesis in the last paragraph.