My review for Alfred's WA2

Pbulished by Liu Yangfan

I am a classmate of Alfred’s and I have read his WA2 essay. Now I am going to make a peer review about this essay.
Generally speaking, this is a good argumentive essay with a clear point-to-point structure. The language is fluent and the choice of word is correct. Besides, the structures of sentence are various and the author’s points are very clear with a lot of powerful supporting.
However, there still exist some little mistakes such as wrong spellings. And there are a lot of sentences which are so long that I become a little confused. For instance, I really cannot figure it out that what is the “they” in the first sentence of the second paragraph referring to. Besides, there are also a lot of noun and verb agreement mistakes such as the “produce” in the second sentence of the third paragraph should be “produces”. In addition, because of the carelessness of the author, some sentences are not complete ones such as the first and the third ones in the third paragraph. Moreover, the style of intext credits is also not correct. The full stop should be behind the parentheses which are used to make an intext credit. At last, the APA style of the references is also not correct.
In a nutshell, this is an essay with a clear point and a clear structure. Nevertheless, there is still some space to be improved.